Monday, April 25, 2011

Monster With a Halo

The other day Pooh informed his mother that his guardian angel is a monster.  She took the news in stride.  "Well," she mused in her best philosophical manner, "this explains so much." 

I myself am fascinated that Pooh would say this.  It makes me wonder what is churning around in that little two-year-old brain of his.  Is he thinking "monster" like in Beauty and the Beast?  Is he thinking "monster" like Grover and the gang on Sesame Street?  Is he imagining a little invisible Shrek or Elmo  wandering around with him, keeping him out of harm's way?

If so, where was this guy when Pooh slammed his thumb in the door or dropped the toybox lid on both his hands?  You have to wonder what good a guardian monster is if he shirks on the job.

And let's consider the mother's comment.  Does this mean she thinks Pooh is somehow like a monster himself?  Let's examine the evidence.

Does Pooh look like a monster?  Hardly.  Rather, he is cherubic, with shaggy blond hair, huge blue eyes, and eyelashes that will make girls jump off bridges in the year 2025.  Does he smell like a monster?  Only once in a while.  Admittedly, the potty training suffers an occasional relapse.

Does Pooh sound like a monster?  Sometimes, I guess.  Let's just say that, as the middle child between two sisters, he has learned to assert himself.  For instance, if Sooby is building a Lego creation and Pooh thinks it is time for her to share, he will hurl himself into it while screaming like a banshee.  His mother sees this as unacceptable; I see it as a survival tactic.

Does Pooh act like a monster?  Now here is where we encounter true shades of gray.  But again, I blame any slightly inappropriate behavior on the Terrible Two's or, again, Middle Child Syndrome.  Plus, Pooh is much smaller for his age than the girls.  He is clearly outsized and outnumbered.  We are talking self-defense here.

It stands to reason, then, that Pooh is indeed influenced by a guardian monster.  It is this monster who tells him to grab a piece of chicken first or hoard numerous grapes or kernels of popcorn under his hand in his own little pile.  Dutifully and faithfully, the monster protects him from the ever-present threat of passive anonymity and helpless dysfunction.

Pooh knows this instinctively.  He understands the reality and the necessity of having a monster for a guardian angel.  It is the rest of us who have to stop and figure it all out.       


  1. Wow. Now I want a monster for my guardian angel.

  2. HA HA HA YOU SAID " His mother sees this as unacceptable; I see it as a survival tactic."
    And that is what happens when you become a grandma ! :)

  3. Can I please borrow the monster guardian angel?

  4. Pooh sounds awesome! Love his imagination and love your story telling!

  5. Truly an imaginative little monster. I agree with the others: I'd like a monster guardian angel, too, please.

    Thank you for joining the GRAND Social party.

  6. I love the idea of a guardian monster. What better personal protection could a kid have? You know, there are those who believe that children can sometimes see their guardian angels. Interesting thought, isn't it.

    I just want to mention that I have a lot of trouble with your word verification. It's very difficult for me to see.

  7. It is interesting how differently Mom and Grandma interpreted the idea of a monster guardian angel! Being a Grandma raising her 2 year old granddaughter - I can see both sides!! :)