When Superheroes Run Amok

From the perspective of a four-year-old, tonsils and their adenoidal sidekicks are kind of like superheroes. Usually they lie in wait in the back of your throat and behind your nasal passages ready to fight any germ that dares to invade your body through your nose or mouth.

But once in a while, because there are adverse forces in the universe, their super powers run amok. As a result, the tonsils and adenoids can harbor recurrent infection or grow so large that they inhibit normal breathing. When this happens, they can disturb sleep, interfere with eating, and, in general, worsen a kid's overall quality of life.

My littlest grandson Heero knows all about this.

When this brave little guy had his tonsils and adenoids removed last month, I got the chance to spend several days with him as he recovered. That experience sent me online to learn more about those renegade superheroes that, in his case, had caused so much trouble. That process led me to some interesting tonsil facts that I share with you here in the event that one of us makes it to Jeopardy and needs to run the category on The Immune System.

Answer: More than 530,000
Question: In America, how many children under 15 years old undergo tonsillectomies each year?

Answer: About 80%
Question: How many kids who have obstructive tonsils removed experience definite improvement in their quality of life? (https://www.choc.org/health-topics/kids-tonsils/)

Answer: 3,000 years ago
Question: When was the first tonsillectomy thought to have been attempted?

I am glad Heero had this procedure in 2018 instead. I doubt that the vinegar-milk concoction worked very well in stopping the flow of blood. I'm putting my money on cold cautery. (Rosenfeld, Jordan. "10 Fascinating Facts About the Tonsils." Mental Floss. 23 Aug. 2017.)

Answer: The technical name of a surgeon specializing in ear, nose, and throat issues
Question: What is an otorhinolaryngologist? (I tell you this before you get to Jeopardy so that you can practice the pronunciation. I don't want Alex Trebek to make fun of you.)

Ask Heero what the worst thing about having a tonsillectomy is, and he will tell you it is taking the medicine for the ten days afterward. For some reason, he hates all the kiddie Tylenols and ibuprofens, even the ones flavored like cherry and bubble gum. Go figure.

But we can already tell that the surgery has enhanced his enjoyment of life. He looks healthier. He seems happier, more content, and more outgoing. He embraces everything we do with a new kind of excitement.

No question about it, Alex. For Heero, life is definitely better without tonsils.

Pokes and Hooks

Imagine you are on "Jeopardy," and Alex asks you for the question that fits this answer:  "Pokes and hooks."

Give up?  I dare to speculate that no appropriate question comes readily to your mind.  That's because such information lurks exclusively in the ever-unique mind of Sooby.

I came to an understanding of pokes and hooks in the early hours of Saturday morning, when Sooby, as usual, awoke early and came to join me as I was sleeping in the guest bedroom at her house.  Note that I said was.  That is because, once Sooby crawls into bed with me, any actual sleeping quickly becomes past tense.

The second I turned over toward her in the pitch darkness of the ever-so-early morning, I knew something was wrong.  I felt the small earring pulling out of my right ear lobe as it brushed hard against the pillow.

"As soon as it gets light," I said to her, "I am going to need you to help me do something."

Although I couldn't see for sure, I imagined her brightening up at this prospect.  She is ever anxious to help, and always enjoys a good mystery.

"What?" she asked.

"My earring came out somewhere in the bed," I said.  "I'm going to need you to help me find it."

"Where did it come out?"

"Somewhere up here around the pillows," I said.  "But we'll wait until daylight to look."

"What does it look like?"

"It's a very small white square," I said.  I could almost hear the gears in that little head of hers churning away toward a new day and the mission it would bring. That's when she asked her most provocative question.

"Is it a hook or a poke?"  It took some time for this question to burn off the brain fog that settles in after the three-hour solo drive and late bedtime of the night before.

Finally understanding, I answered, "It's a poke.  Now, let's try to sleep a little bit more."  Although there was no further sleep in my horoscope that day, Sooby did find both pieces of the lost earring once we had a little sunlight to work with.

So there you have it--the question you will need should you find yourself in a TV studio with Alex Trebek. Imagine yourself in Final Jeopardy, with a fortune on the line, as Alex reveals the final answer: Hooks and Pokes.

When that happens, grab your marker as the familiar theme song winds down, and dash off your question with a dramatic flair: "What are the two kinds of pierced earrings?"